17:57:48 -

And he is. PlayStation Home. "PS fans are using PlayStation Home in the same way people use other social media." To send them invites to take part in zombie fights and go to barbecues?

17:57:12 -

They've generated over $280m worth of revenue, says Andrew. Take it home, House!

17:56:19 -

The number of global downloads has now passed 560 million.

17:56:03 -

Oh right. PlayStation Network. The number of PSN "registrants" is now over 27m, including 11m in SCEE alone. That's a "connection rate" of 60 per cent.

17:55:14 -

"But that's only half the story. The industry has changed and we now find ourselves in a networked world." Didn't they already do a network adapter?

17:54:59 -

PS3. Global sales are 23.7 million, and SCEE installed base has broken through the 10 million barrier. In just over 2 years.

17:54:27 -

"We're confident PSP will go from strength to strength."

17:54:14 -

PSP now. Global sales at 52.9m, 17m in SCEE regions.

17:53:41 -

138.8 million PS2s have now been sold globally. That includes 52m in SCEE regions alone.

17:53:33 -

PS2, "Or as I like to call it, the Michael Schumacher of games consoles."

17:53:15 -

"Tonight I'd like to take you through our business strategy" oh good. "But before we talk about where we're going, let me remind you about the solid foundations of our current business." GRAPHTIME!

17:52:57 -

"We began to see gaming coming out of the bedroom and into the living room." And yet, strangely, pornography remained where it was.

17:52:12 -

He's definitely trimmed his goatee specially. It's as neat as that bit in Police Academy when he uses the megaphone with the shoe polish round the end. "When we launched PS2 in 2000" yes yes very nice well done NEW GAMES PLEASE.

17:51:55 -

"I've been part of the PS family for over 15 years." How come we only heard of you six months ago then? [After SCEE boss David Reeves retired - Ed]

17:51:06 -

"Please welcome to the stage, Andrew House." We don't have a nickname for him at Eurogamer, but every time we say his name we do the big box-little box-cardboard box move.

17:50:50 -

Buzz, billiards, DC Online, White Knight Chronicles. Yes very nice WHERE IS THRILL DRIVE.

17:49:45 -

Ratchet & Clank and Heavy Rain. These are all just brief clips though. SingStar, My SingStar Online community share. Dizzy Rascal really is Bonkers, isn't he?

17:48:53 -

PlayStation Home! Is it out yet?

17:48:46 -

Aaaa it's starting. Video of ModNation Racers, God of War III, some old PSP nonsense, EyePet.

17:48:02 -

"The press conference is about to begin." Come on then! We are PUMPED, as VG247's Patrick Garratt would say.

17:47:15 -

Eurogamer TV's Johnny Minkley is sitting just behind me, How are you enjoying the conference so far, Johnny? "I'm just glad I got here massively late and Sony are even more massively late than I am. Did I miss any sausages?"

17:45:08 -

Tanja has a lovely tan. I do not. It's like a pint of milk sitting next to a cup of tea.

17:44:32 -

So much for that SingStar Beatles to be announced at EA rumour. Unless they're about to announce it now? 8-1 I reckon.

17:43:55 -

Let's take some bets on what's about to be announced. PS3 Slim: 2-1. Price cut: 4-1. PlayStation 4: 10-1. Shuhei Yoshida and Kaz Hirai to take part in civil partnership ceremony live on stage: 50-1.

17:42:02 -

"The press conference will begin in five minutes." Crikey oh riley, what are we going to do?

17:40:43 -

At the front of the stage are big white letters saying "THE GAME IS JUST THE START". I ask Tanja if she is offended that the message is in English, seeing as we are, you know, in Germany. "No." Kristian from Eurogamer Germany says, "German is a very clumsy language. So it's fine."

17:39:40 -

I am sitting between Phil "GamesIndustry.biz" Elliott and Tanja "Eurogamer Germany" Menne.

17:38:44 -

Playing in the background are some jolly beats. I believe it's Track 4 on The Best Pre-Games Conference Contemporary Yet Unchallenging Mid-Tempo House Music Album in the World Ever Vol II.

17:37:11 -

A big screen is displaying some lovely lifestyle ribbons of light zooming round a spacey landscape. Lots of squares, triangles, crosses etc.

17:36:11 -

So far there has been an announcement about not using tripods on the ground floor. And not much else.

17:35:53 -

HELLO WEMBLEY. Here we are at Sony's gamescom conference in Cologne.

17:27:58 -

Good afternoon! Ellie is queuing to take her seat at the Sony press conference. We'll begin shortly.